At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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