My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
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