i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
Randomize
