just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
I think I just sharted jello shots
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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