I accidentally burped into my bong.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
do herpes really smell.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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