I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
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