I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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