addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
