You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
Randomize
