But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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