Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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