I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
