And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?