glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I'm experimenting with sincerity
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
