found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
