OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
