I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize