so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
He fell asleep and I'm awkwardly laying here because all I have to wear is my tutu. I'm pretty sure his roommate is going to be back soon so this should be fun. This is my life now. PS. the background of his phone is a picture of his hedgehog.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize
