just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
