I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
Randomize
