I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
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