Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize