sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
