lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Randomize
