So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
you kept eating the heads off the gummy bears and screaming 'euthanized!'
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
