oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
