Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
