ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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