when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Randomize
