I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
