There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
