Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
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