For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Just puked most of my soul out..
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
