Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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