I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
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