Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
