Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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