new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
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