It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
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