Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
well most of my day revolves around power hour
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
