After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
