Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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