Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
