I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
