Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
