is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Randomize
