It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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