haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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