Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Randomize