I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
