very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
i just got referred to as "the Loch Ness Cockster". God bless my Scottish heritage.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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